Thursday, July 28, 2011

Decisions...decisions

Warning...this post may contain information that could be considered "TMI"

I am back on the topic of infertility and the time is coming again where I will find out if I need to start buying diapers or decide how to continue on my "treatment" if thats what you want to call it.  I hate that word because it almost makes me feel as though there is something wrong with me or I am not quite right.  August will be my 3rd month of Letrozole and my next doctors visit is August 31st.  I had hoped that I wouldn't need to make a decision like this since the doctor assured me in most cases this is all it usually takes.  I still hope she is right, but maybe I am not usual.

The next step we spoke about at my first doctors appointment was to do IUI.  I am still not sure how I feel about that.  It seems so unnatural.  I guess the feeling of not being in control of your body is unnatural.

I am considering trying a more wholistic treatment before I got the IUI route, acupuncture, massage, vitamins...I guess I am just trying to be proactive instead of reactive.  I am too much of an emotional mess to make these kind of decisions when the time comes to make them. I have come to the point where it is very hard to stay positive because if the test doesn't have to be (+) I don't either anymore.  I guess maybe it just makes the disappointment easier.

Anways, these are many of the things that are stirring around in my mind as I try to get through each day preparing myself emotionally for another month of disappointment.  Please feel free to leave "constructive" comments.  I don't need to hear anything more about being patient, it will happen when it is right, reminding me I am still young, or telling me to just relax..I did that the first 22 months and look how well that worked out.

I'm looking more for types of herbal treatments, acupunturists in the area or other alternatives.  Feel free to remain anonymous or email me instead at julie.goss@hotmail.com .

Julie

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Julie, I just wanted to say good luck, and I will be sending you good vibes your way. Also, for family and friends, there is a good blog post on how to be supportive of anyone going through infertility. http://jennandtonica.com/ifcomm-101/

Anonymous said...

Thank you for your support. I love that blog post, brought me to tears actually because it was right on the money. - Julie (I don't know why it won't let me comment with my user account.)