Wednesday, November 27, 2013

New Look, OB Update and Thanksgiving Review

How do you like the new look.  I feel like every time I go to change things I find a cool new feature! 

My OB Update is really not an update because not much has really changed.  Cervix is still softening, but no dilation at this point.  The OB rooted around in there quite a bit and caused some bleeding, but still no contractions at this point.  However, she said it can change quickly.  My next appointment will be next Tuesday at 1:15 (one day past my due date) that we will begin to discuss our options if nothing has happened at that point.

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving and I'm so happy this year that we have so much to be thankful for.  I can't help but just think back exactly one year to this time.  Remember this?  Right before Thanksgiving we found our 3rd and final attempt at IUI didn't work.  I remember my world falling apart.  I drank too much wine at Thanksgiving and spent most of it sleeping on a very small couch in my brother's basement in a turkey and wine induced coma.  It wasn't pretty by any means.  Thankfully I was able to pull myself back together shortly after and start preparing for my IVF cycle. 

So many things have changed, some good and some bad.  As you know, we started out the year preparing for the IVF cycle, one cancelled cycle in January and full charge in February resulting in a POSITIVE beta in March!  April brought a much needed career change for me and then in May a much needed career change for Dick.  We cruised through spring and summer which in August brought some bad news, the passing of our beloved Bosko.  While I can't say I'm thankful for losing him, I am thankful that he isn't suffering and I know we made the right decision at the time to let him go. 

September we started to heal from that blow and October brought even more tragic news...October 5th, the day my Dad passed away.  After that it was very hard to be thankful for anything...why MY Dad?  Why now?  Why?  God has His reasons.  We've had time to reflect and realize that even though we don't know exactly why we can be thankful for the time we did have with him.  The special bond we formed over the past years while I thought God was punishing me and not letting me have a baby, maybe he was just giving me this time to get close with my Dad.  That is exactly what happened.  My relationship with my Dad changed over the past 4 years, while still Father-Daughter we also became friends.  We went on trips, we chatted about life, we went hunting together and spent weekends hanging out watching football and playing cards.  These are things that may have not happened if I had immediately gotten my wish to become a mother.  I'm not saying that I believe that was the exact reason any of this took place, but I can say I'm thankful for how things worked out.  I still get sad and cry, but often times its hard to cry for long because I begin to think about the wine tasting we did at 10AM on our way home from our fishing trip, or the smile on his face when I shot my first buck with my bow or how much fun we had playing an intense game of 5 handed sheepshead the last weekend I spent with him up at the cabin.

Despite the tragedy this year has brought us, the blessings are also so evident and its hard to be anything but thankful for all we have been given.  The best is yet to come!!!

I will leave you with some pictures.  The first is our Christmas Tree which I did finally get around to decorating! little Lady who is preparing to become a big sister!

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