Thursday, June 28, 2012 Eggs!

Okay just a little complaining to do today.  It is the final day of pill poppin' and boy am I feeling crampy.  I don't remember feeling this way the last couple times.  It is definitely not ovulation pain (I tested to make sure).  I can only cross my fingers and hope that I am growing some nice big eggies/follicles in there.

Anyone want to guess how many I will have this time?  What a fun game (LOL).

In the past I have had Feb 2012 (L-1 and R-1) and Mar 2012 (L-3 and R-0).

I'm going to be optimistic and go with L-1 and R-2 (right side hurts the most).  Stay tuned!


Tuesday, June 26, 2012

Feeling..."Hard to Love"

Ever heard this song? 

I am now full swing into pill poppin' this month and I am starting to feel it and perhaps the above song/video is appropriate.  I feel bitchy, sad and tired pretty much most of my day...hard to love.  Its the hormones.  I start out in the AM with a handful of these:

  • (5) pink pills 125mg of Letrozole
  • larger brown pill prenatal (starting to feel like a bad joke)
  • (3) maternal herbal and then (3) more at night
Now this is nowhere near the amount of meds. for an IVF, but even this amount can really make you feel like a crazy person.  Speaking of IVF, it is not next up on our plate, but I did have the "informational packet" sent from the doctors office.  I hope and pray we don't get to that point, but it is no longer all that far away anymore on our list of options.  Anyways, 2 more days (phew) of pill poppin' and then fingers crossed for good news on our follicle ultrasound.  We will be going back and forth during our camping trip to the doctors office and hopefully having our IUI next week at some point I'm thinking Sunday or Monday.

Anyways, until then another acupuncture appointment tomorrow and hopefully after that finding myself less and less "hard to love".


Monday, June 18, 2012

Jumping Back in With Two Feet - IUI #2

I am TERRIBLE at relaxing (ask my husband, it drives him crazy).  I have a really hard time sitting still let alone waiting for something to happen.  I guess what I am trying to say is my IF "break" is over.  I thought I was going to wait the summer, see what happened but I just couldn't keep sitting back and waiting.  This cycle we are moving forward with IUI #2.

I had one of those magical epiphanies where you feel like God is trying to tell you something.  I thought at first he was punishing me, trying to make my life miserable, but the more I thought about it I realized, nope he is just providing me the strength and motivation I need to keep moving forward.  I know now that this is what I am supposed to be doing.  Not taking a back seat as IF runs my life, but putting up a fight and giving this everything I have.  Now as a warning, this won't be pretty.  It is going to be difficult and emotionally painful but at this point I know what I am getting myself into.  I've done it before and I can do it again.  I'm not going to stop until they finally tell me that it is not physically possible to have children.

This will be a test.  A test of my relationship with my husband, a test of my own strength and a test for those closest to me.  I have been and will continue to be open about our infertility.  I know this makes some people uncomfortable.  I know that as more and more of my friends begin to start their own families they may want not want to hear about our struggles because it is hard to hear.  I don't blame them. However, there are a few relationships that have grown stronger than ever because of this. 

Here is what I ask of you who want to move forward with me into battle:
  1. Prayers - please this is #1 for me for a reason.
  2. Supportive notes, comments or emails.  You can't imagine how much this brightens my day and I will be needing it.  Especially keep June 30th - July 2st as those are the U/S and IUI possible dates.
  3. Awareness - people don't like to talk about infertility, but it is REAL and affects so many people.  Be respectful of those couples who do not yet have children.  You never know what they are/have gone through.
Thank you for following my blog and welcome to cycle 33 of TTC.


Wednesday, June 13, 2012

As of is good.

Nope...still not pregnant, but not totally obsessing about it either every second of the day.  I think the break from hormones, endless doctors appointments and shots really has done me a lot of good.  Oh and add in the fact that I have been on a steady exercise routine and dropped a few pounds doesn't hurt either.

My summer activies/plans include:
  1. My daily AM workout - challenge with co-worker.
  2. Guitar lessons on Mondays
  3. Thursday night bean bag league with the MR.
  4. Tending to my garden and the endless weeds.
  5. Keeping an eye on my new rose bushes - pics to come on this.
  6. Looking forward to a summer wedding.
  7. 4th of July camping with friends.
  8. Nightly reading.
  9. Summer "shortened" hours on Friday's for work.
  10. Cooking and soon to be cooking from the garden!
I would say it is the perfect start to summer.  What do you have planned for this summer?


Thursday, June 7, 2012

New Stuff

I was having a little fun the other day with my new phone and playing around with apps.  See above photo from Instagram.  That has been the story in our house the past week since we both got smart phones.  I'm sure all my friends already know this since I am now texting everyone non-stop :).  It is really nice to have access to the web while at home (we don't have wireless) but at the same time I hope some of this is just a bit of a phase. 

I have a pet peeve about people using their phones in inappropriate places, while you are talking to someone and when you are trying to visit with someone.  I am trying to not become that person.  Anyways, that is about it for "new stuff", but it does seem like a big change for us.  I even downloaded blogger on my phone so you might be seeing a "mobile blog update" in the future!